Awkward Family Photo Anaylsis

1. This photo contains what seems to be a loving family where a husband and a wife has two daughters. The father in this photo is shirtless, has his back turned to the camera, showing off his tatted back. The tattoos on his back are the faces of the 3 women in the picture, which I am assuming is his family. The youngest daughter in the image appears to be grabbing her fathers with a closed, innocent smile.
2. What draws my attention to the photograph is the fathers back. He is shirtless and tan and is the center of the photo. That automatically draws your attention to his 3 tattoos of the women in his life with a portrait of their face and their name above or below the tattoo.
3. This photograph portrays a long story because of the tattoos. It makes me wonder why they decided to have a family photo like this and it also makes you wonder what made the father get his back tatted with his family's faces and names on it. Was there a life threatening situation where he almost lose them? or was it just out of love.
4. Being a daughter and having siblings, influences my position of this photo. I think that the father getting his back tattooed of the ones he loves is a way to show his dedication to his family and also his attachment. I would be honored if my father did this because he would ruin his body to show is love. However, it almost seems as though the older daughter in this image is embarrassed of her family because of her smile.

FLAMINGOS CAUGHT MAKING A FLAMINGO

Intros and Conclusions

Strategies I am going to use to draw readers into my paper through the introduction is to begin with a hypothetical story. Reading the Music Television Mike introduction influenced me to completely do a turn around with my intro. My intro now is boring and not compelling to readers and just explains what I am going to discuss throughout my paper. I want to begin with a hypothetical situation about what would happen if I didn't watch T.V. as a child and what my life would be like then. I haven't thought about how I am going to begin this yet or what the situation will be, but I have faith I will come up with something magical. 

So that is how I am going to begin my paper but I'm still wondering how I will end it in a way that will leave readers thinking further. Referring back to The McGraw-Hill Handbook, I think I am going to summarize my main point and suggest some implications for the future. Basically explain what my paper focused on and how it will benefit me in the future and maybe future generations. 

Honestly, my conclusion now is a piece of crap that took me 3 minutes to write because I was too exhausted from writing 6 pages already. But now that I have a big chunk of my paper written, I can now focus on my intro and conclusion. My conclusion now just has some general, broad statements about T.V. and how it has shaped people. That clearly doesn't work so I now have a lot to work on to make my paper interesting and comprehendible. 

Being a Class Blogger

Yesterday, Wednesday, September 19, 2012 I was our class blogger for the day. I was supposed to be class blogger for class on Friday the 21, but unfortunately we do not have class that day so I figured I would get it out of the way yesterday. Since I didn't really know what the role of class blogger was intended to do, I just decided to wing it through the class. I took notes on everything that happened in class beginning from when Professor Lang took attendance to what our homework was for the following class. Since she went over a few powerpoint slides, I wrote down everything the power point slides said so no one would be behind in learning how to peer review a paper. All you basically do is summarize what went on in class and since I didn't have time in class to write the blog, I took my notes home and wrote it before the next day started. At the end I added a little link to a video that related to what we did in class, or you could add images as well. I enjoyed being the class blogger for the day because it helped me better understand what we learned that day in class. I know you all may think it is annoying but it is really not bad and is easy so don't fuss over it! It is better to know what you are doing in class rather than being completely clueless! So I hope you all enjoy being the class blogger as much as I did and I sure you all will do a great job!! :)

Class Blogger for the Day: 9/19

Like any other Monday, Wednesday or Friday in ENC1101, Professor Lang started the class off by taking attendance. Since she was a little late (happens to all of us) so she didn't have time to ask us an interesting question and we were all so eager to begin proof reading each others drafts. What we focused on the majority of the class was proof reading our peers drafts but we worked with someone who hasn't already read our paper. Before we split away with our partners, Professor Lang went through a few powerpoint slides that discussed global issues and higher order concerns. We learned that when doing peer review, you want to look at the global issues or issues that affect the paper as a whole, look at the thesis or focus, audience which is the teacher and peers and making sure it is appropriate. You want to also take a look at the purpose, organization, development of paragraphs and the point of view of the paper. Instead of just looking at what we should do, we went over a few things of what NOT to do. What you are NOT doing is you are not editing, you are just revising. We learned that revision is NOT rewording and avoiding repetition or fixing an error that does not affect other parts of the paper. You are also not working with local issues/ lower concerns (grammar, spelling, punctuation, etc.). You are looking critically at your own writing to determine: if it is really worth saying, if it says what you wanted to say, if a reader will understand what your are saying. We also went over what is peer review? She explained that it is objective feedback, having a fresh set of eyes is always a good thing and to be kind but honest while peer reviewing. After this we went over briefly the when and the why of peer review, to learn to look at your own writing in a different way.

Then we finally broke off with our partners and began reading through each others essays. We were told to underline  passages that we thought were strong, draw a squiggly line under passages you thought were weak or confusing and leave comments and recommended revisions along the way. After you finished proof reading, we were told to get out a separate sheet of paper and quickly answer the following questions. 

1. Consider what the assignment is asking you to do. Is this essay fulfilling those requirements? Why or why not?

2. What is working well in the essay? Explain why they are working well.

3. How is the organization of the essay working? What changes might you recommend?

After we read and answered those questions on a separate sheet of paper, we then discussed with our partner what our comments meant and how we felt about their paper. And finally as the class came to an unfortunate end, as always we blogged the last 5 minutes about what we thought went well, what did not go well and what will you change or won't change about your paper. Since we don't have class this Friday the 21, our homework for Monday the 24 is to read McGraw Hill Handbook, intros and conclusions and bring the handbook to class. Also because we didn't use the second copy of our draft in class make sure you bring it to class on Monday. 

I hope I was able to give a good brief description of class today!! Here is a fun link about why proof reading papers is important...ENJOY!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p_rwB5_3PQc

Peer Review 2

While peer reviewing, I learned a few things about my paper that went well and didn't go well. My partner told me that I had some good examples and good summaries of the television shows, however I needed to add a few more in other sections. My ending to my paper is a little weak and I needed to discuss more of the good values I learned about watching the Kardashians. I am going to add a paragraph or two at the end just summarizing up all of the shows I watching and how it shaped me to be who I am today. I won't change some of my stronger points in the paper and I will leave all of my summaries the way they are.

Feedback

As I review the feedback on my second rough draft, I am finally getting a clear understanding of what this paper is asking for how to properly analyze it. What we discussed in class today was that we shouldn't give a broad comparison of two different genres with different audiences and as I look back at my paper and the feedback given to me, I did exactly that. I realized when I was rereading the paragraph where I summarized Keeping up with the Kardashians that I somehow compared it to Little Bear and the shows I watched when I was younger and that just doesn't make sense. I need to think about who is the audience for the Kardashians, what it means and how this show specifically changed my perspective of the world. And basically in my conclusion, instead of giving big claims that are broad and compare different genres and audiences, I need to tie together how each television show changed my view of the world and not how media has changed because only my taste in T.V. has. All of the feedback that I received was very helpful and overall I need to change the way I analyzed each show and instead just discuss how it made me feel and not others. Not only was the feedback very helpful but the activity we did in class made me understand how to analyze a show and the steps it takes to do so.

Discovery Draft Review

This discovery draft really allowed me to get all my thoughts I had about this paper and just simply write it out in an unorganized manner. I am writing a television show narrative that shows the difference in the television shows I watched as a little girl to what I watch now. I began by discussing how watching Little Bear as a young girl made me feel and what I learned from it, then discussed how watching Hannah Montana as a teenager was relatable to my life then and then how Keeping up with the Kardashians is taking over pop culture and teaching invaluable lessons. My goal for this paper is to show how much my taste in television has evolved throughout my life and it shows what people really care about watching in their spare time. Working with my group member was very helpful because we were both in the same position where we were concerned our paper wasn't going in the right direction but after reading each others paper we realized what was missing and figured out ways to make them better. In my next draft, I am going to have a more organized and structured paper that does not have bullets or notes on it. I will include more analysis about the way the television shows affected me growing up and how it made me perceive the world as I know it.